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Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Month One Review: April 11 - May 11


Today marks one month since I’ve taken that first tentative but determined step to becoming a happier, healthier me. I can’t give you a number of pounds lost, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say I’ve gone down a pants’ size, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say I’ve lost so many inches on my waist, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say whether my body mass index has changed, because that’s not what this is about. 

And since that is not what this is about, I haven’t kept track of any of those things. I am only tracking what I do, and whether or not it makes me feel happier or healthier. I know health is generally measured by people who’ve spent quite a few years going through higher education and can now wear the white lab coats and prescribe medications for whatever ails their patients. I don’t visit doctors; never have, so I can’t relay their opinion of my changing body, mind, and spirit. I can only share how I feel, what I think, how successful I find myself, and my will to keep going or to change my methods. 

I’m here and proud to proclaim: I HAVE MADE IT A MONTH, I WILL MAKE IT A WHOLE LIFETIME LONGER. 

This is not a diet that I’ll do for a few months, lose some weight, then go right back to the way I was. This is not a rigorous bout of exercise that I’ll do for a few months, lose some weight, then go right back to the way I was. This is a lifestyle change, this is a new way of looking at life and of living my life. 

I’m never going to look the way I did a month ago ever again in my life. I’m never going to feel content with hating myself on a daily basis ever again in my life. I’m never going back to that place or that time ever again in my life. I refuse to let myself down, it will not happen. 

So I’ll stop and admire this one-month-mark much like a family on vacation stops and admires the biggest ball of yarn as they pass it on the highway. It is significant, it is a big deal, but no one really knows why we have to stop and take pictures in front of it. But I suppose it is nice to know I’ve made it this far without stopping or giving up. But this isn’t even the beginning. I have a whole lifetime of happy, healthy living ahead of me.

I still have habits to break, cravings to ignore, motivation to find, and milestones to reach. I still have every day that I wake up to make happy and healthy decisions for that day. I just have to keep on going, can’t stop and smell the yarn for too long!

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