day thirty-seven: new way of keeping track!

I enjoy writing daily blogs here on Happy Healthy Gina, but on some days, I don't have much to report and writing out the Daily Stats of what I've eaten and the exercise I've done has also become tedious and isn't all that important to this blog. This blog is more a place to store thoughts, methods, and motivations. I use this blog to express what I'm thinking and whether or not a particular activity is helping or hindering me on my journey.

That being typed, I still think that keeping daily track of my activities is motivating because I have to write down and admit to at least myself what I did or didn't do or what I ate or didn't eat that day. I can also look back and see a physical declaration of the work I've put into this whole charade. Luck struck me this afternoon, when a perfectly adequate and internet-independent way of keeping track of my exercise and eating literally fell at my feet.

I was cleaning off the window sills in my apartment (one is used for a bookshelf and the other holds phone books and also kitchen knick knacks) when a stack of books I was lifting off the shelf went crashing to the floor. The logo for the Biggest Loser television show jumped out at me and I scooped up three different books. One was a weight loss tracker, in which you record your daily caloric (as well as trans fats, saturated fats, sodium, and more) intake and also your exercise routine for that day. It was also full of tips and tricks and outlined the Biggest Loser program. It even had a button on the front that could be pushed and it spoke motivational phrases and stories to you from the cast of the Biggest Loser.

It was really cool, and had a lot of good information in it, but the book itself is far too big and bulky to carry around on a daily basis, and plus I haven't been tracking calories and sodium and all that bullocks. I've just been eating less and making sure the majority of my food is fresh fruits and vegetables. When I get too much into numbers and measuring, I lose track of where I'm going and just get caught up in measuring things. Eventually I stop doing it because I get tired of measuring out servings every time I want to eat a meal.

The other book was a recipe book that's now sitting next to my stove and has a lot of tasty-sounding and healthy recipes in it that I will certainly have to try.

The last Biggest Loser item I had sitting on my shelf is the one I'm most excited about and am already using. It's a Meal and Exercise Planner. My only issue is that it will run out rather quickly. I think it's only a month's worth of pages. I wonder if I can buy just the little planner, because it's the perfect size to tuck into my purse and give just the right amount of room to jot down what exercising I did and what meals I ate throughout the day. Here are some pics:

(Ignore my terrible nail polish. I meant to remove that polish and repaint my nails today, but I was busy all the way up until I had to leave for work.)

The Biggest Loser allows for three meals and two snacks throughout the day, but I usually only have time for two meals, three when I can, and one snack. So I ignore the extra snack slot because I'm not awake enough hours in the day to eat all of that food. The amount I eat now is just right for me. I don't get hungry and I feel full throughout the day. I'm going to be working on making sure to fit breakfast into my schedule, which means going to bed earlier so that I can rise earlier.

(I'd hate to blame my man for this, but usually if he's around, I tend to stay up later after work. But that can no longer be accepted as an excuse! So if you read this, babe... I NEED MY BEAUTY SLEEP! lololol Just kidding, talking to you is the best part of my day.)

Basically, I'm super excited about this planner, I know it will serve me very very well and this week has been going so swimmingly! Even though this morning I didn't get to work out, I did clean my apartment and take all the books off my bookshelf. It may not have been heart pumping cardio, but I wasn't sitting on my ass playing Sims 3, so I don't count it as a wasted morning.

Tonight I'm going to try the Biggest Loser Power Sculpt DVD for the first time, and I'm really excited about it. There are weights in the gym here at work, and a TV, so I'm all set!

P.S. I had such a delicious lunch today, made one of my favorite meals ever: a chicken-stuffed bell pepper! It had mushrooms, onions, garlic, salsa, and chicken in it with a little cheddar cheese on top. It was so delicious!

day thirty-six: weekly exercise schedule

I've decided to make a checklist of sorts for my weekly exercise schedule. Basically, I list the days of the week, and all the exercise routines I like to do. At the beginning of the week, I highlight the routines I seek to do at certain times on certain days. As the week goes on, I'll simply circle in pen which ones I did, whether it ended up being the highlighted ones or not.

The reason I'm not scheduling them in absolute stone is because some routines, such as going for a walk or jog, depends on the weather. If the weather is good, I'm going to go outside and walk/jog rather than stay inside and ride the exercise bike or do a workout DVD. So tentative to the weather, and also what I feel like doing that day (I may get bored with a DVD and so switch to doing stair runs at work or something similar), I am scheduling my workouts to the best of my ability.

Here's what the schedule looks like:

 

And after I've highlighted this week's workout choices: 

I also leave a blank space on each day in case something changes or I come up with something new that I want to do that day. I have to keep my routines fresh and new each week or else I get bored.

Fast Food Breakdown

This morning I was checking my bank account balances, as people do, and I decided to flip back a few pages through my spending history and see what I used to spend so much money on, and the answer surprised me. I knew I was eating out a lot more than I should have been. I was aware of that fact. But seeing the numbers and the actual monetary amounts I was spending on the "convenience" and "easiness" of fast food amazed and sickened me. No wonder I was sliding into the realms of unhealthy obesity at an alarming rate... I was eating enough fast food to feed a whole family in a single day!

Here's an example of a few sections of my bank statement reflecting the fast food I was eating on a daily basis.

There were plenty of days where I would eat at two different restaurants on the same day! Now, I know that debit card transactions don't always go through on the day they actually occurred, but I know I was eating at different restaurants on the same day. My days literally consisted of sleeping until an hour before work, rolling my gelatanous ass out of bed, showering, and then grabbing lunch on the way to work. Four hours later, at dinnertime, I would leave work and go to a different restaurant, or sometimes even the same restaurant, for dinner. Then I would come home and eat a meal right before bed from my refrigerator.

I just didn't care, I was out of control. I couldn't see anything beyond the wrapped fast food in front of my face as I was choking it down. Looking back, I can't believe I let myself get to that place. Not only for my health's sake, but for my wallet's sake. I was throwing away money as fast as I could eat those Big Macs and Subway sandwiches. I was handing over my hard-earned cash to gain pounds of fat on my body.

Never again. Eating out is a terrible thing, not when I can make cheaper and healthier foods right here at home. Food that makes me feel good after eating it, food that doesn't give me a quick sugar rush and then a devastating crash twenty minutes later, food that is filling and satisfying and that adds to my body's nutrients and needs. Food that is meant to be eaten, not food that is wrapped in paper, thrown in a bag, and shoveled down my throat while I drive to work. There was no love and attention put into that food, there is nothing valuable or nutritious in that food.

Seeing this drove the point home for me. What I am doing is a complete change from where I was, and I know I can't and won't go back to that place. It wasn't good for me, my body, my environment, my finances, or my well-being. I'm saddened that I didn't see that fault in where I was much sooner, but at least I am doing better now.

I've come a long way and have a long way to go, but I'm not turning back.

facing fear and saying, "fuck you!"

It's that time. I've decided to post the dreaded comparison shots. A picture a friend took of me, innocently, at a baseball game back in April, in which I look terrible and the picture makes me want to cry and vomit and scream all at the same time, will be placed side by side with some shots taken today wearing a smaller sized pair of jeans and some Vera Wang leggings.

I'm not sure I'm ready for this, but as I need to realize: this is just the start of the journey. I know I look ten times better already than I did in that April snapshot. It's only going to get better from here on out. I need to show how far I've already come, and give myself and the world a realistic view of this journey I'm taking. There are people I don't want to see these pictures, I barely want to see these pictures, but it's a part of where I was, where I am now, and when I look back a week, a month, a year from now, I'll be able to puff out my chest and smile, epically proud of the ground I've covered and the changes I've made in my life, health, and happiness.

So here goes nothing:

day thirty-three: re-evaluating and correcting!

Month Two is going to be a swift kick in the ass: I’m stepping up my workout routines and no longer allowing myself to take mornings off. I’m going back to working out two times a day, at least five days a week, and at least once a day on the weekends. 

I’ve been doing so well with planning out my meals every week, that I’m going to make a more detailed workout plan for the weeks as well, this way, I can stick to a plan instead of making it up when the time comes. I find that I let myself be lazy and am not working my muscles as hard as they need to be worked. Exercising has become too easy now, so I have to start pushing myself farther. I know that planning the week’s exercising ahead of time will force me to stick to harder workouts. 

My favorite workout routine, besides jogs around the neighborhood and hard running on an elliptical, is the Biggest Loser Cardio Workout DVD. I am not endorsed by them, or anyone, but I must give the show and the trainers on the workout DVDs a shout out. The workouts on that DVD push me to the limit, sweat pours off me every time, and I feel great after doing them. When the first level gets too easy, you bump it up to level two, and then level three. It’s designed to be a six week program, and I’ve lost over forty pounds before using just that DVD according to its instructions (work out 5-6 times a week, doing two weeks on each level). 

This time around, I’ve been using the DVD sparingly, and only when I really want to sweat because it makes me work hard. I ordered the Power Sculpt edition of the Biggest Loser Workout and I can’t wait to receive it in the mail. I should be getting it on Tuesday, and will be adding it into my workout routines. Alongside cardio, I have to sculpt and tone my body, so I don’t end up with excess flab or skin. I want to be toned and lean and fit, and I know using these two DVD workouts will get me there. 

I also use Jackie Warner’s workout DVD, and that’s a very good DVD as well. She utilizes a circuit training technique to sculpt your body, and I like her style. She focuses a lot on form, and spends extra time making sure the form of her moves is understood and carried out correctly. I like that, because sometimes I may think I am doing the moves correctly, but then when I try again and I do EXACTLY as the trainer says, I’ll feel a whole different muscle being worked and realize I wasn’t doing it right the first time. 

So Month Two will begin detailed planning of my meals for the week AND my workouts for the week. I’m also working on getting a lot more fresh fruits and vegetables into my diet. If I have to go to the store three times a week, I will, just to be able to put some fresh fruits and vegetables into my diet. I deviate from these plans every so often, according to what I want to eat, or if I spend time with friends or family, but for the most part, I stick to them. I make sure not to eat out (have only done so twice in the last 30+ days) or snack beyond my allotted snack between lunch and dinner (which is always a fresh fruit or a fiber bar).

To sum up Month Two’s changes from Month One:

1.   Harder workouts, twice a day Monday through Friday, and once a day Saturday and Sunday. 
2. More fresh vegetables and fresh fruits in my diet. 
3.    Plan workouts like I’ve been planning weekly meal lists. Continue with weekly meal lists.  

day thirty-one: huzzah, the schedule is back!

So jury duty is finally over, the trial is finished, the verdict is in. The main reason I’m excited about this (because, really, I kind of enjoyed doing jury duty instead of going to work for two days and I enjoyed seeing the world before noon and seeing sunlight after “work”) but it was disheartening to forfeit my carefully planned eating schedule and workout habits for two days. It felt like an eternity passed and I was itching to get back into my routine again. 

This is too much information, but I'm sure you're figured out by now that I’m never sparing in that department, but even my bowel movements were starting to become erratic and strange. On my schedule, I pretty much know when they are coming and what they will consist of, as strange as that may sound. I missed that, I didn’t like my world being turned pretty much opposite of normal. But now, I’m back into the daily grind, and although jury duty was a great experience, I’m intensely happy to be able to get back into the swing of things. 

I’m going grocery shopping tonight, and I only have to pick up a handful of items for this week’s meal schedule. Granted, there are only two more working days and then the weekend left to this week, but I’m quite happy that I have only to buy a few things to make decent meals for those four days. I’m especially looking forward to the homemade pineapple and ham pizza I’m making on Saturday evening. I’ve been craving pizza, and I think making one myself will be slightly healthier than one from a restaurant, and I happen to have all the ingredients already to make it, save for the crust and sauce. 

No fresh veggies, really, this week, but I’ve had an abundance of them the last few weeks. Next week, I will make sure to find more vegetable-heavy recipes to fit fresh, or at least grilled, vegetables into my meals. I try to find a good balance of a fresh fruit and a vegetable and a meat per day. The rest of this week sees no fresh vegetables, which is not a good thing, I know, but I need to get some of the frozen foods out of my fridge and also to use up the bread and eggs that could possibly go bad and be wasted. I’d hate to buy a bunch of fresh vegetables and ignore things that need to be eaten due to quickly approaching expiration dates, and then have to throw a bunch of wasted food away. 

Plus, my fresh vegetable recipes are pretty scarce at the moment, relying mostly on grilled shish kabobs and stir fry dishes. My stuffed bell pepper recipe is amazing, but those three dishes are my main fresh vegetable staples. I’m no good at making salads, I wish I knew ways to put them together better, but I will become better at it with practice and with eating them more. 

I need to find more recipes, though, so I don’t get tired of eating the same variations on a few recipes every week. It’s just intimidating sometimes to try whole new recipes, especially if they call for a spice or something that you have to buy a large quantity of (say, brown sugar) and you know you won’t use that particular ingredient in anything else for a long, long time. I don’t have a lot of cabinet space, so buying spices and sugars and other ingredients takes up room I don’t have. So I need to search for easy recipes that use fresh vegetables to add to my recipe folder, but that won't force me to buy too many new spices and other "extras" that I don't have room to store. That is my mission. 

Day Thirty-One Stats:

Wake Up: 11:30 AM

Breakfast: Yogurt

Lunch: Baked potato with butter, salsa, ham, and cheddar cheese

Snack: Special K bar

Exercise: 26 minutes on elliptical with Arm Blaster mode

Dinner: Roast Beef Melt and potato salad from McAlister’s Deli (I got a five dollar gift certificate from work and was planning on Subway anyway because I didn’t have anything at home to bring for dinner).

My meal plan for the week:

Month One Review: April 11 - May 11

Today marks one month since I’ve taken that first tentative but determined step to becoming a happier, healthier me. I can’t give you a number of pounds lost, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say I’ve gone down a pants’ size, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say I’ve lost so many inches on my waist, because that’s not what this is about. I can’t say whether my body mass index has changed, because that’s not what this is about. 

And since that is not what this is about, I haven’t kept track of any of those things. I am only tracking what I do, and whether or not it makes me feel happier or healthier. I know health is generally measured by people who’ve spent quite a few years going through higher education and can now wear the white lab coats and prescribe medications for whatever ails their patients. I don’t visit doctors; never have, so I can’t relay their opinion of my changing body, mind, and spirit. I can only share how I feel, what I think, how successful I find myself, and my will to keep going or to change my methods. 

I’m here and proud to proclaim: I HAVE MADE IT A MONTH, I WILL MAKE IT A WHOLE LIFETIME LONGER. 

This is not a diet that I’ll do for a few months, lose some weight, then go right back to the way I was. This is not a rigorous bout of exercise that I’ll do for a few months, lose some weight, then go right back to the way I was. This is a lifestyle change, this is a new way of looking at life and of living my life. 

I’m never going to look the way I did a month ago ever again in my life. I’m never going to feel content with hating myself on a daily basis ever again in my life. I’m never going back to that place or that time ever again in my life. I refuse to let myself down, it will not happen. 

So I’ll stop and admire this one-month-mark much like a family on vacation stops and admires the biggest ball of yarn as they pass it on the highway. It is significant, it is a big deal, but no one really knows why we have to stop and take pictures in front of it. But I suppose it is nice to know I’ve made it this far without stopping or giving up. But this isn’t even the beginning. I have a whole lifetime of happy, healthy living ahead of me.

I still have habits to break, cravings to ignore, motivation to find, and milestones to reach. I still have every day that I wake up to make happy and healthy decisions for that day. I just have to keep on going, can’t stop and smell the yarn for too long!